August 27

August 27
So I have almost one full week of teaching down. I think I am starting to get the hang of it. I feel less threatened by the kids or something. I go in there now knowing that I am the teacher and that they know that. All of us in the house go through our days where we feel like we wish we hadn’t done this, chosen to be a teacher for a year, but usually we all wake up out of our funk for the next day. This is sure a hard thing to do with no training. I’m doing my best but I know I could do much better if I had studied teaching in school. I guess if it wasn’t a requirement then I shouldn’t be too worried about it.
Yesterday we had a chapel service before school started. I had a very strange experience during the Eucharist. As the children lined up to receive communion there was a teacher asking “eres bautizado?” Are you baptized? When they answered no she literally turned them around to get out of line. I was so disgusted. I guess most of the faith communities I have been a part my whole life feel that everyone is welcomed to God’s table. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I for the first time in my life, that I can remember anyway, chose to not go up for communion. I struggled with the desire to have communion, something I have always loved, but to go up made me feel as if I thought I was better than all the little children who had not been baptized. So I stood there trying to get a hold of what was happening in front of me. I had a third grader ask if she could go up even though she wasn’t baptized, I told her we could go up together with our arms crossed and receive a blessing but she didn’t want to stand out like that. Ugh, it just broke my heart. I can look at it now and realize that its probably typical of the Honduran churches to be very traditional in this way but that still doesn’t make it right for me. I’m still trying to decide whether I want to take communion next week or choose to not receive unless all are welcome.
Today I only had three classes so I had the whole afternoon to prep for next weeks lessons. It was great to get those done and makes me feel eager about the weekend and not doing much by way of teaching. Tomorrow I have all six classes. I’ll be pooped tomorrow afternoon but at least I will have earned my weekend 
Yesterday and today Emily and I went over to the school/home campus to run. We went after a nap and then after we run we hang out with the girls and eat dinner at the home. Tonight we had baleadas. It’s a Honduran food, not really that special it seems, but definitely the crepe to France. It’s a tortilla with refried beans, special cheese, sour cream and sometimes meat or avocado in the middle if your are lucky. I think it tastes good but its not anything to um… write home about… but I guess I am. So maybe it is? Haha.
There are a couple of young girls at the home who like to come sit on my lap every once in awhile. I hug them super tight and picture Dash and Emmanuel in my arms. I’m so thankful to have little ones around in their absence but I really miss those sweet nephews of mine!
That’s all for now, I’m going to read The Color Purple for a bit and then head to bed. I’m a working woman now and I gotta get my sleep. I’m not used to looking forward to going to bed by nine.